Excerpts from this.
On the original script for Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy:
Basically, it was about anchormen flying to an anchorman convention. Mid-flight, they hit some sort of UPS plane and they crash into a mountain and it becomes like the movie Alive. All the anchormen start dying, they start eating each other. And occasionally, the contents of the UPS plane — which was monkeys and throwing stars — start attacking their base camp. And we sent that around, and it was SO funny, but we couldn't get anyone to make it.
On the somewhat disturbing influence of Adam Sandler on his career and writing style:
Adam is very open about certain things. He's the first guy I knew who would talk about masturbating. [...] When I moved in with Adam, he'd be like, "Hey man, let's go to Red Lobster but first I'm gonna go whack off. I'll see you in ten minutes." And then he'd come out and be like, "Okay, let's go." And that threw me. And he had a running thing where he'd would always say, "Let me see the cock. Lemme see. Lemme see what you got." And I was like, "I'm not going to show you my penis." And he was like, "Lemme just see it, let's get it over with." And one day when I was peeing, I saw him standing behind me in the mirror. [Mimes Sandler looking at him quizzically] And then he just goes, "Alright, man, alright."